Behaved Himself Wisely. 1st Samuel 18:14. “And David behaved himself wisely in all his ways, and the Lord was with him.” David’s military actions elevated him to prominence before the people. Heroes are in a precarious position because there are those who want to honor them and those who are jealous of them. To balance people's appreciation with the inner tendency of pride and to accept the gratitude of people with dignity, humility, and integrity takes wisdom. David conducted his life wisely as a servant of Saul even though he knew he had been privately anointed to be the next king.
The pressure is on; the public is watching to see how you handle your pride when flattery, praise, and honor are given. After all, God has used you; this surely means something. I wonder what you are like deep inside. The proof is there in each public situation, and your consistency was maintained before watching and admiring crowds of people. In every situation and consideration, David’s testimony and integrity were sustained. The Lord was with him in private and when he was in the public eye. He had learned the true value of faith in God to do what was right in the eyes of God.
One wrote these words, “It takes more grace than I can tell to play the second fiddle well,” knowing the nature of people. David never took matters into his own hands. He knew God had anointed Saul to be king of Israel and to be subject to God meant that he must be subject to the divinely appointed authority no matter how bad God allowed things to get. David was responsible for waiting for God’s timing and guidance and conducting his life wisely.
Wise behavior entails a genuine walk of humility so that no charges can be laid against me. Giving God all the glory and not crediting my ability to win spiritual victories will allow me to see and experience God’s blessings. Wise behavior in private involves living honorably and honestly with integrity when I am by myself before God without anyone else knowing how I live and think. Living like that keeps fellowship with God at the forefront of my life, personally and publicly. Other people will only know me as a man of my word, but God will be able to trust me more.
In contrast to Jonathan's love and appreciation of David is Saul's jealousy and rage. Jealousy and murder are next-door neighbors in the dark soul of a natural man. Saul had easily forgotten David, who had opened the way to victory for Israel when he killed Goliath. He seemed so self-centered that even when David played the harp or lyre for him, he quickly forgot him. Self-centered people easily set aside the importance of others and their benefit for all because they are the center of all their thoughts. "I... me... and my" are all valuable to them. A self-absorbed person has chosen to be ignorant of both God and man.
Self-love and pride are almost one and the same. Saul’s selfishness made him suspicious of others, their motives, and their actions. One can almost imagine what was in Saul’s mind: “Who is this? What does he want? Why does he do this?” Not only was Saul selfish, but he was also envious of what belonged to another. He is like many who cannot stand to see another person honored.
Saul’s envy broke forth when the admiring women sang the praises of David. Envy claims for itself that which another has earned and seeks a way to not only claim it for one's self but to deny it to another person. Envy shuts out love, mercy, and grace by replacing them with jealousy, covetousness, and hatred. Envy can strangle a person to such an extent that everything else is shut out until its claims are met.
Saul’s hatred followed hard on the path of envy, which became uncontrolled hate when he threw javelins at David with the intent of killing him. The characteristic of an evil spirit is hatred that stirs one's soul into acting irrationally and with deep-seated malice, which leads to no peace. No matter how soothing the song or how peaceful the surroundings, hatred, when in control, is treacherously set about in its attempts to wreak havoc in the lives of others to satisfy its thirst for vengeance.
A peculiar power in modesty and reticence appeals to most people. Saul's unheard-of request that David kill one hundred Philistines as a dowry for his daughter was obviously a desire to have David killed. All who knew about that request would have been amazed when David returned with the evidence that two hundred Philistines had died to meet Saul’s request. Also, it would have been evidence that God wanted David to live, and Saul would have known that fact, too.
Saul’s treachery looks for ways to make David fall with the intent that he will be killed. Saul could see his influence, even in his family, slipping away because of his self-centered life. The evil he sought to bring on David was thwarted at every turn. He could recognize that God was for David and had abandoned him. Now, he was even losing his family, who could see in David that which they knew was missing in their father. Like a cold, dark dampness covering his soul and spirit, treachery left Saul a quivering mess of human flesh far removed from the warmth and light of God’s grace that he rejected.
Once it begins, treachery is usually unstoppable without the serious consequence of one person dying. Looking for ways to bring another person down and failing time after time does not stop the treacherous heart from planning other ways to accomplish an evil intent. It makes a treacherous person more determined to break, defeat, and eliminate the object of one’s evil actions.
Our Lord was the object of the envy and hatred of the leaders of Israel when He was here. The more grace, mercy, and goodness He demonstrated, the greater their evil intent to kill Him. Even when "He was reviled, He reviled not again. When He suffered, He threatened not." Their strategy was to find in Him some fault, but Pilate said, "I find in Him no fault at all."
Whether it was Saul's mind of hatred, his eye of jealousy, or his javelin of murderous intent, all of his strategies failed because God was with David. And to add even more to his deep-seated anger was the fact that the people loved David. All the intrigue in the palace did not turn the gratitude-love of the people away from David because of the victories the Lord was giving on their behalf. He was like a shepherd who wanted to be with the sheep when he was among them. Even in the household servants of Saul the King, there was a love of admiration for David. They appreciated his dignity and humility even as they watched Saul plotting to kill him. That admiring love made them suggest that Saul give David his daughter as a wife.
The love of Michal for David was the natural love of one who was married to another. She loved David when he pleased her but not when he pleased God. The love that gratitude produces is appreciated but may come and go depending on the circumstances of life that are going on. Admiration produces love because it can see the value of a person and the benefits it brings to other people. Natural love, "phileo," may come or go depending on the state of mind a person has at the time. But that may not last because it is based on human emotion.
The love of full surrender to another person because of the value we see and know to be in that person is the kind of love God has for us. That love holds nothing back and is willing to see another exalted at our expense. Our greatest joy in relationships comes when we are willing to give all for the blessing of another and truly expect nothing in return. Of all character traits that are developed and nurtured in a human being, "the greatest of these is love."
Self-occupation is a twisted perception of one's own importance. When someone expects praise and honor and is not forthcoming, that expectation can turn into jealousy, envy, and hatred. One well-thought-out poem was written...
"He that is down need fear no fall, He that is low, not pride. He that is humble shall ever have, God to be his guide."