Proverbs 6 LISTEN TO YOUR PARENTS It is not uncommon for people, when they become adults, to think they know as much, and likely more, than their parents. They might know more about computers, science, business and how to make money, but it takes a lot longer to know about people. Parents have been around long enough that they can often make a good judgment call on people by watching their eyes and body language, and also listening to the tone of voice and where inflections are placed in conversation. That skill comes by experience, not from some classroom professor who lives in the ivory tower of higher learning that is isolated from the real world where most people live and work.
In this chapter of the book of Proverbs there are six different people that are spoken of, some of whom we need to be warned against. The son in this context is not some young child but a grown person about to go out on his own into the world of all kinds of people, all kinds of temptation and all kinds of danger. Both father and mother have serious concern for the son as he walks away from them and strikes out on his own, so they give him warnings as well as good advice. Then there is the money-grabber, the person who makes money off of unsuspecting people by borrowing money for some get-rich-quick scheme and then leave you holding the bag. Following him is the lazy bum who won’t work and think he is entitled to all his parents and friends will give him. The worthless trouble-maker is also warned against because he doesn’t only cause trouble wherever he goes, but wants to get you involved. Then comes the “strange woman,” not the stranger, but the neighbor’s wife who wants sexual adventures. Lastly there is the jealous husband who is out to get a foolish young man.
The description of these people in society in the past, fits society in the present. We have to give our children and young adults teaching, instruction and training, but that isn’t enough. We also have to give warnings to unsuspecting people who are moving out into an ungodly “Me first” society. To be forewarned is to be forearmed. We owe it to the next generation make sure they know what they will be running into. We can’t make them obey what we say, nor can we be assured they will even pay attention to our concern for them, but at least we can warn them, and tell them what we have experienced and know they will run into in dealing with people who are not believers in our Lord Jesus Christ.
Friends can turn out to be a problem if they try to get you to loan them money for some project, they will convince you will give you a real good return on your investment. If something seems to be almost too good to be true, it almost always is. There are extortioners and hard-nosed people in business who may not appear to be dishonest, but be very cautious in what you say and do. You will be pressured at times to co-sign for a family member or someone you know, but co-signing is a trap. It may not be a deliberate trap, but it is a liability you are making to be responsible for another person’s debt. When you sign, you are financially obligated until that debt is paid. Those who borrow to get more than they need, are not to be trusted.
A Christian must be as good as their word. If you say it, you are responsible carry a matter through to the end. The father who speaks in this chapter urges his son who perhaps got caught in the trap of loaning money, to get free from this obligation as soon as he could. The longer he stayed in the situation, the worse it would get, so get out of it even if it means you will be humiliated in some way. In order to keep your reputation, your integrity and your good name, don’t put off doing what needs to be done before you go to sleep. There are good reasons to be afraid of what may be coming on you so act quickly.
The next person of concern is the one who is lazy, and the father uses the ant to illustrate what should be the responsible way to work. We learn from that creature that we are responsible to provide for ourselves and others, not expect them to provide for us. Meet your own needs. Be responsible rather than lazy. Don’t think you are entitled to be cared for by your parents, other people or the government when you are able-bodied. Personal initiative is expected, so get out of bed early and go to work. A grown young man shouldn’t have to be told what to do when he already knows what is expected of him and what he can do and should do. Opportunities do not wait for your convenience. Take them when you can. Use every advantage available to you to prepare for coming needs whether you know what they are or not. Don’t hesitate to work when you can so that you will be able to care for yourself and your family when the time comes that you can’t work. Remember, work is honorable, and can be enjoyable if we choose to set our mind that way.
A “sluggard” seems to think he needs a lot of sleep and needs someone to take care of him so he can stay in bed late, and sleep away his time. He convinces himself he needs more sleep than he gets if he goes to work. The lazy person always wants a little more time to fold his hands over his belly in casual complacency. Small things become big debts and unfulfilled obligations quite quickly. Remember, reckoning time will come. When you have nothing, and have given no reason to others to help support you, you will soon find no one will want anything to do with you.
There is another kind of person to beware of. He is not just lazy, but he is trouble in a body. He is really a worthless person who a wise person will avoid if at all possible. He talks dirty and may use curse words saying it is only a habit that he got from others. He doesn’t think it is a big deal to use bad language when he walks and looks around at people and makes uncouth comments. Young people sometimes do that to impress other young people, but that is demeaning to the one who speaks and can embarrassing to the one who hears what he says.
There are a lot of signs that such a person is shifty and not to be trusted. Shuffling feet, rolling of the eyes, winking at girls, pointing a finger, all indicate that he is not a person you want to associate with nor be a companion of. Often a person like that is actually planning serious mischief and maybe even breaking of the law. That person usually has some deceit in his heart, and for his own nefarious reasons creates dissension and division among others for some selfish motive for his benefit. A slanderer wants to put someone else down and put himself up. In God’s plan of things and divine providence, calamity will come on such a person and the disaster that will come on him will be permanent. “Payday, someday.”
Some people think because God is love, He cannot hate. The seven things listed here are so common among people today, that they think God would be peevish or petty to hate them. They have convinced themselves that they are basically good except for a few faults that are common to everyone. But this list pretty well covers all that people think about themselves. A proud look reflects a proud heart that expresses itself in a way that passes judgment on another person based on what they see. In essence it means, “I am better than you.” Their lying tongue speaks words of deceit, half-truths and open falsehood. The lying tongue is characteristic of Satan who is the father of lies. Those who do not tell the truth are like Satan who uses lies deliberately. Believers are to put away lying and speak the truth to those we meet.
Murder is deliberately taking the life of another even if your hand may not touch the victim. You may not like that person because they are interfering with your life and inconveniencing you in some way. For some dark reason, many people today think they can murder unborn children and get away with it because a court says it is okay. Any person with life is valuable to God and “be sure your sin will find you out” is a life principle that we should never forget.
Planning for wicked activities is a challenge against righteousness of life that God expects from people. Such plans will bring divine judgment down on a person in the time and way of God’s choosing. Those who rush to do evil, whether it is an individual, or in this modern day a mob of young people who like to riot, break things, burn, do damage to property and do injury to people, are hated by God.
The lies of false witnesses have put innocent people behind bars, caused the death of others and caused others to commit suicide. Some false witnesses have even caused wars. People bore false witness against the Lord Jesus when He was here, so we can expect them to do the same to believers in Him. Unfair criticism, gossip and self- opinionated heretics can create divisions that will never be healed.
In the middle of these warnings, parental advice is given to an adult son who is likely going out on his own. He was told that he was taught and trained by his father, and taught and cared for by his mother. All they taught him should not be forgotten but placed deeply in his heart, and made obvious to others so they know where he stands in society. He knew what they taught was right, now he had to practice it himself and make it openly clear to others what his convictions are.
Think about all you learned when you are making plans, making decisions and taking action on any matter. “What would father and mother do?” “How would they deal with this person or this issue?” “What would they think if they knew what I was doing now?” Whether you are far away from home in the military or on a business trip, remember who you are, who taught you, and who you represent. In the sleepless nights of decision making, do not fantasize or imagine vain things. Be serious, be cautious, be wise. In the morning when you wake up, do the right thing. Act on what you know is right and you will not be ashamed. You will know when to say, “No,” and when you do what you do, right, the way God intended, then you can ask God’s blessing on it.
But you will have to be super-careful. Not every married woman is content in her marriage or faithful to her husband. Young men are fair game for some married women and they will begin their hunt by flattering you. Then they will tempt you to go beyond what you know is right in a more gradual and subtle way than a prostitute who is in it for the money. If you think you can get away with having sex with a married woman, you are greatly mistaken. Beauty and boldness along with provocative words, actions and glances can quickly overcome the inhibitions of a young man. The convictions you thought you had, and you will and conscience, will be overcome if you stay in that place with that woman.
A prostitute will cost you money, but a married woman who seduces a man can be much worse for a lot of reasons. She can blackmail you, tell her husband you attacked her, or tell the police you raped her. Your whole life can be ruined in a brief time for a fleeting bit of pleasure that can in no way last. Not matter what immoral actions you take and think you are getting away with, there will be a high cost. Remember, “Whatsoever a man soweth, that shall he also reap.” You will get burned when you play with fire. No matter what you think you gained from a short time of gratification, it will come back to bite you.
Not only will it burn in your mind and heart, but adultery will have serious negative consequences on your life and walk before people and before God. There is an awful price to pay when a man commits adultery with a neighbor’s wife. It will not be hidden. Your credibility as a trustworthy person will be lost. Your reputation as a philanderer will not go away. Sin will be exposed. A starving hungry thief who steals for food has done wrong, and will have to face the consequences of what he did. But there is a sense in which he will be pitied, even by those he wronged. He may be able to pay back what he stole and a fine or some jail time will satisfy the people he wronged.
The adulterer will never be able to make amends for what he did, he has damaged the lives of other people, and done irreparable damage to himself. He may be attacked and beaten by those he wronged. He will be shamed and disgraced. He will never forget what he did and how foolish it was to go against the warnings of his parents when he was young. He was even warned again when he was an adult leaving home. The anger of a wronged and jealous husband will never go away. There is no way he can make up to the husband what he took, even though it was offered to him. Likely the husband will seek revenge in some way even if it is a long time coming, because he knows you will be living in fear and will wonder daily what is going to happen and when. The situation in which an adulterer will have to live for the rest of his life will be fraught with anxiety and remorse, and there is nothing that can be done about it. No money paid, no humble action taken, no tears of repentance and remorse will remove the fact that and an adulterer has taken that from one or more people that which he had no right to have and there is no way to give it back again.