THE REASON FOR SADNESS. Nehemiah 2:3-4 Respectful boldness is not arrogance nor aggressive behavior. When we know the Lord is with us in our fears, we realize He will enable us to do what He desires of us. God can do the same for us when we are before judges or are placed in some frightening position. "Whatsoever shall be given you in that hour, that speak ye for it is not ye that speak, but the Holy Ghost." Whenever we are called in question, it is right to give honor to whom honor is due. We owe them the respect their office deserves. It is wrong "to speak evil of dignities." It is right "to be subject to the higher powers."
Nehemiah’s sorrow was real and evident because of the state of the city of his ancestors, the place where they lived, died, and were buried. That would resonate with the king because that was of great importance to people in those days. Nehemiah’s response to Artaxerxes’ question was nonthreatening, precise, and perfectly suited to the setting. It was evidence of the king’s trust in Nehemiah that he was questioned rather than killed.
God was with His servant, using His demeanor, facial expression, and words appropriately. He honored the king, and he made an understandable request with clarity. He did not use the name of the city of Jerusalem because that would have had political connotations. Rather, under divine direction, he wisely spoke of "the city where my fathers are buried" to define his desire in a way the king could identify with. Respect for the dead is universal among almost every culture in the world.
That reply made his request both precise and personal, even though it was phrased as a question. Answering a question with a question is one of the best ways to open a dialogue and foster understanding, because the questioner, in essence, answers their own question. The king trusted Nehemiah as a man and knew him well enough that anything Nehemiah asked for was of great importance to him. It made sense that the king would want a specific answer, a specific place, and a specific time when a trusted servant requested a leave of absence. A short prayer in his mind, "to the God of heaven," gave Nehemiah the right words to say in the right way.
People often will not share the same interest in, or sense of urgency about, a matter that we do, but if we have their confidence, they will assist us or act on our behalf. Ambiguity does not sit well in any situation, especially when one is answering a question. When unbelievers ask us about our faith, where we attend "church," and what we believe or why we do what we do, they have a right to a clear answer. People expect that what we do as Christians is not secretive. They may be antagonistic or indifferent, but when we reply, our tone of voice and attitude are often as important as what we say. A respectful reply to an antagonistic, critical person can be disarming when we allow the Holy Spirit to guide our words.
We cannot always hide our sadness or joy, even though we are people who have put our faith in the Lord Jesus Christ and personally know the sovereign God. When we are “Weak and heavy laden, cumbered with a load of care,” we need to remember that the blessed Savior is still our refuge. We can take everything to the Lord in prayer and find solace there.