Proverbs 20 HONESTY AND DISCIPLINE Success in life means different things to different people. Some measure success by material things they are able to accumulate, either by hard work or by underhanded business dealings. What they have that is able to be seen by others is how they measure success. Other people who are famous or hold high positions believe that is the measure of their success. That usually comes from talent or the skillful manipulating of people to their personal advantage. To raise a family of children to be honorable citizens who use their intelligence for good purposes is success to some parents. To have influenced people for good is what other people consider success in life. All of these have one thing in common – discipline. A person has to learn how to say “no’ to some things and “yes” to others. Discipline of one’s own self or imposed discipline by others is needed. There is a goal they have and to reach that goal, they must submit to discipline.
Personal discipline in social settings or when one indulges in self-pity, is seriously needed because any beverage with alcohol in it has a tendency to put a person under the control of a “spirit.” Stores even advertise “wine, liquor, spirits and beer.” When the brain is affected by alcohol, it has an effect on emotions, physical actions and reactions, self-control, speech and discernment. Another spirit takes control and deceives a person under its influence. Personal discipline is also needed when one is pulled over by a patrolman, when standing before a judge or called to testify or deal with some government official. To provoke them by some “smart” remark is a danger to yourself. Personal discipline will hold a person back from an argument or volatile situation in which a quarrel can result. Fools can start a fight but it takes a self-disciplined person who knows themselves to use their moral strength and spiritual wisdom, to avoid retaliating when wronged. Prove your strength by exercising restraint. That takes more courage than fighting.
Personal discipline takes action when it is right and needed, not when a person “feels like it.” To plow your ground at the wrong time, or leave it until a convenient time, will affect your harvest next year. If you don’t save money ahead of time, you won’t have it when you need it. If you put off studying until the last minute, you will probably fail the test. God provides for us, but He expects us to act wisely and prepare ahead of time. A man of experience and sensible judgment, doesn’t speak until he knows what is the real issue being discussed, what is at stake, and what a good outcome of the matter would be. He holds his counsel and understanding of the matter until asked for some advice. When he speaks, he doesn’t sound like a “know-it-all,” but is rather able to give sound biblical answers, or counsel based on scriptural and spiritual principles. He keeps his own words under control.
It is more important for people to know what God thinks of us, than for us to know what we think of ourselves. Most people today say of themselves, “I’m basically a good person. I make a few mistakes but really, I’m good.” A faithful honest man will not advertise himself. He knows what he is, what God thinks of him and he disciplines himself accordingly. A faithful father knows his own children are forming their character after how he speaks, what he does, how he loves and expresses his love for his wife, how he treats his children, how he acts in public and in private. His influence on his children will be known, and hopefully, practiced by them and their children. That man has to discipline himself.
Those in authority look carefully at those who are before them, and often make decisions by just observing body language. The expression of the eyes and mouth, the tilt of a head and the movement of fingers and feet pass on messages as to the character of the person with whom he is dealing. With his eyes he is looking beyond words spoken to see the attitude. The attitude of deceit or truth; actions that indicate an attitude; are unspoken messages that produce those actions and determine whether a person can be trusted or not. No one is without sin. It is in the nature of man. “death has passed upon all men, for all have sinned.” “All have sinned and come short of the glory of God.” Kings and criminals both sin; but it is up to each person to take ownership and responsibility for their own sin. That comes when in honesty before God, we acknowledge we have sinned and need God’s mercy. What we cannot do about our own sin, He is able and willing to do for us. This happens when there is repentance before God for our sin, and we put faith in our Lord Jesus Christ for our salvation from sin. “The blood of Jesus Christ His (God’s) Son, cleanseth us from all sin.”
There are unchanging standards of righteousness that God has established. To change those for any reason places us under the condemnation of our holy God. It is our responsibility to not make excuses for not doing what is right or doing what is wrong. The character of a person is evident by what a person does. There is a sense in which the character of parents is passed on to their children, but as time goes by, what a child does or is allowed to do, will add to or take from their strength of character. Imposed discipline by caring parents will enforce what is good and right, and expose what is bad and evil. In divine wisdom, God has given us ears and eyes as entrances to our soul to by which we build character when those two entrances are well guarded. Those two body parts are capable of bringing understanding in, and keeping evil out of us. Personal discipline is what is the deciding factor.
There are opportunities that are missed because of lack of personal discipline. To sleep late expecting you will get later what is available now is foolish. Manna fell in the wilderness by the tons to feed the children of Israel, but they had to get it before the sun was up. God used that time frame as a way to discipline His people to be prepared early for the challenges and blessings of the day ahead. A disciplined person knows ahead of time the value of an item. No matter why the buyer might say in a negative way, the worth of it is known by the seller and he has the choice as to what he is going to do, in spite of the way a buyer might put down its value in order to make a higher profit for himself. Some people say it doesn’t really matter what you believe as long as you are sincere. Others are willing to compromise truth in order to be accepted by other people or to make what we know to be of high value acceptable to them. Truth never changes in value. A disciplined person does not “sell the truth” for any price. In contrast to what the buyer claimed was of little value, is gold and jewels that are considered of great value. And they are as far as this world system is concerned. But of far greater value are the words of understanding that comes from a person who has discernment and discipline. He won’t “cast pearls before swine,” nor will he demean or depreciate the worth of divine truth.
Carelessness in business happens when one is sentimental or hasty, rather than disciplined. Taking collateral for a loan is common sense, and the more personal the collateral, the better. Not everyone in business is reliable and honest, so we know that it has to be something they value to them personally that is suitable for security. An ample amount of security gives incentive to the borrower to discipline themselves as to how they use what they have borrowed. The appeal of getting away with something, soon becomes bitter when conscience starts to convict us and the consequences of deceit attack us. What seemed to be good at the first, seriously hurts in the end.
There is a common saying, “Two heads are better than one,” and that is so true. It is not easy to differentiate between what we want and what we should have or what is right. We are almost always biased in our own favor, so by taking counsel with a wise person or two, we can determine if our plans are meaningful, measurable and manageable. If I cannot control by personal discipline one area of life by what I say, then it is not likely I will be dependable in other areas. A gossip cannot be trusted with anything if it is of a confidential nature. One who flatters isn’t really telling the truth, so it is best to avoid both in others, and makes sure neither one of those evil things is in me.
Ignoring the counsel of your parents is bad enough, but to speak evil of them, disrespect them and curse them, means you are on a downward course that leads to premature death. Under the law of Moses, a son who did that could legally be put to death by being stoned. The future heritage of a family depends on the respect and honor given to those who are older. The prodigal son couldn’t wait to get his greedy hands on his father’s money. To get an inheritance early indicates deception or some covetous reason to get a share of inheritance before it can “bless” you as it should or could. You will never get back an inheritance once it is spent. To take matters into our own hands when we have been wronged is not right. Some things we must leave God to do, because He knows every side to every story. He makes impartial decisions because of His knowledge of every issue. When wronged, our response should be to show kindness that will overcome evil.
Dishonesty is not just a way business may be done which is condemned, but of greater importance is the fact that it reveals the kind of person we are dealing with. Shady dealing or dishonesty exposes the character of that person and we see them for what they really are. Deceit and dishonesty are sure ways to determine the lack of spiritual life in a person. No matter who a person is or the position they hold, a good and wise man looks to the Lord to guide him all the way through his life. We may not know the reason behind the things that happen to us, but no sensible spiritual man will take credit to himself for what the Lord does.
Don’t promise to do what you later find out you can’t do. To act without thinking a matter through to its conclusion is a trap. Vows are to keep, not to try to keep. Great intentions don’t excuse a person from the consequences of a vow not kept. “It is better not to vow, than to vow and not pay.” Don’t be afraid to ask pertinent questions and take counsel from wise people before taking a step into something from which there is no escape. The difference between right and wrong, innocence and guilt are able to be discerned by a wise person who knows how to apply the right amount of pressure to get the facts. When he has learned by careful means what is the right action to take, there will be no question as to the fairness of his judgment of a matter.
The Holy Spirit in the world today convicts people of sin, righteousness and judgment. Our own spirit is like a light that has been wired up by God, and in spite of what a person may want, we cannot hide from the law that is placed in every person by God. A believer in Christ has an advantage of “the Spirit bearing witness with our spirit.” Our new nature gives us the desire to walk in the light, and be light and salt in the world. When a leader of people shows love to those for whom he is responsible, and is willing to demonstrate kindness and a trustworthy nature to those he leads, people will gladly accept his leadership and follow his counsel, because they know he is a man of truth, mercy and grace. These characteristics keep a leader as a balanced person in his guidance and in passing judgments. That in turn creates stability among those he leads.
There are a variety of ways for older people to show respect to younger people, and for the young to show respect for the older. Young people deserve the focused attention of those who are older when they have sincere comments and opinions. Questions that are not “loaded” deserve an answer or a promise to seek an answer if one is not readily available. Young people have strength that needs to be used in the furtherance of their calling as they look ahead. Older people have learned what they know by experience, training and repeated use over a long period of time as they look back to “all the way my Savior leads (led) me…”
Sometimes severe punishment is needed to correct bad behavior by making it hurt enough so a person won’t do the same thing again. To make everybody “feel good about themselves,” is a deception that has bad results. The actual physical punishment does affect the attitude of the soul of a person to the extent that they will seriously think about everything they do and the possible outcome of those plans. Every part of our being: body, soul and spirit, is affected by what happens to the other parts. Discipline of the mind has an effect on the body. What causes pain to the body, affects the spirit. Depression or joy can have an effect for good or bad on the whole person.